The internet is awesome, I just gotta say that. Me and my supervisor, who loves 2001 (go figure), we're discussing said movie. And we started discussing the soundtrack, so we jumped on the computers and searched for it’s wikipage, and there I see:
"Sequels and adaptations"
There’s a sequel? Someone actually adapted the second book to a movie? So you know, I HAVE to see it.. I MUST! I have to see if it’s as confusing as the 2001. Wait, this one isn’t directed by Stanley Kubrick, but by Peter Hyams. Let’s see if Hyams makes as weird movies as Kubrick, so I am going to sit down and watch “2010: The Year We Make Contact”.
Wow.. We begin with a creepy voice saying: “My God, it’s full of stars!”.
Stars?
Or stars?
Or Stars?
Anyways... Moving on..
Well.. If anyone hasn’t seen 2001 and are going to see 2010, they don’t have to be afraid. They sum it up in 3 minutes. Why didn’t I skip 2001 and jump directly to this one? Oh.. I didn’t know this one existed, but now I do and I’m currently watching it. The music right now is awful. But Dr. Heywood Floyd is back. And here comes the title screen, with the obligatory Richard Strauss’ “Also sprach Zarathustra”. Oh great, that guy who plays Pete Thornton in MacGyver is playing a russian. And they didn’t even get the original actor, to replay the role of Dr. Heywood Floyd. What’s next? There’s a “PAL-10000”?
Ah.. It’s the introducing dialogue, I should’ve seen that coming.
“Hey, Heywood, you messed up. Didn’t you?”
“And?”
“I got an offer for you.”
“Which is?”
“Wouldn’t you like to get back to austronautics?”
“But you’re a Russian!”
“And you are American.”
“Fine. You convinced me. I’ll do it!”
“But I didn’t tell you what the job is.”
“I’m convinced! LET’S GO!”
"But I still feel I should tell you what the job is..."
"Fine.."
"Ah, good! The job is..."
"I'll take it!"
"But..."
"No more talk, Russian.. Let's GO!"
What?! I’m wrong?! I was so certain that’s how the conversation would go, but it didn’t. Interesting.. So, it’s still the cold war? Wait, when were these books written? 1982? Okay? So in 2010, the cold war is still on. And now the Russians want Americans with them to space to check out the ship from the last movie, because the Russians don’t know American gadgetry. Wow, riveting stuff!
And now we see the creator of HAL-9000, who just reeks of geek, comes into the office and.. Wait, what?! SAL-9000? SAL? SAL?! He has another one of those?! Fine.. Fine.. SAL-9000. And SAL is as creepy and calm as HAL was. Chills just went down my spine.
Look at the geek!
And now we cut to Heywood’s house. Wow, Heywood Floyd must be filthy rich. He has a pool with dolphins in them! I want that too! And now he had to tell his family that he is going to space. Heey! When did the American government say okay to go with the Russians, who they are currently fighting a cold war with? When did this happen? Have I skipped a part? Oh.. Whatever...
Hey look! The laptops in 2010 are amazing:
Now, he is in space. And it looks like J. Michael Straczynski has borrowed the ship design from this movie. They found something, and no, it’s not evidence that Batman will analyze with science. The Russians find something, they wake Heywood from hibernation. And then treat him like shit, just because his an American. Those bastards! Oh yeah, I don’t know what that was what they found, but it took out a probe by flashing. And no, not flashing like this:
Ah finally, the two other Americans have been awakened, now Heywood doesn’t have to feel so alone receiving the hate, at least they’re three who receive hate. It’s Heywood, Chandra, the creator of HAL 9000, and Dick Solomon or John Lithgow if you like, I didn’t catch his name. I think I’ll call him Dick Solomon if his name doesn’t attach to my memory.
Looks like Hyams has kept the thing where you can hear the peoples breathing. Why? It’s disturbing listening to John Lithgow moaning and panting, I am not sure if I can go on watching this.
So they found the ship, they’re going to enter it. Why am I thinking Dead Space? Floating corpses, undead and monsters from space?
If I remember correctly, Dead Space used the breathing as a scare tool. But I’m sidetracking. But think about it, an abandoned ship in space. There’s something eerie about it. And two guys are going into the ship, Dick Solomon and a Russian, let’s hope there aren’t any space zombies who want flesh. No, it’s fine. Now they’re planning to turn HAL 9000 on, obviously they like danger.
Now they’re sending the movies obvious comedy relief to certain death, it’s Russian who keeps saying the sayings wrong: Piece of Pie and Easy as Cake. Let’s see if Max survives, since the movie is making such a big fuzz of him going out to this monolith thing.
R. I. P. Max, presumed dead.
I salute you!
I salute you!
And on that bombshell.. I'll end part 1 here! Stay tuned for part 2.
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